Alright ladies and gentleman here we are, the moment we've all been waiting for! Or is it? Have you ever found yourself boasting about an upcoming event, I mean literally losing your ability to sleep, only to be let down by the outcome of that experience? Perhaps it wasn't that what you were expecting wasn't good enough, but because your imagination itself raised the bar too high for actual reality to ever compete with. Yeah. I'm sure we all have, but you know what? It's OKAY! If anything, I think it's better that our imaginations can be little knifing pricks on what sometimes seems like a continuous basis. I'm sure it sounds ludicrous and bizarre that I'm typing this, but just hear me out-
Imagine, you're three weeks away from a vacation of a life time. You can feel the sand on your skin and the one, maybe six, rum and cokes surging through your blood. You prepare yourself aesthetically and are excited to reward yourself with a mental vacation from the fast pace society we were obligated into at birth. Maybe not everyone, so hats off to you lucky people out there escaping the harsh thorns of life. Anyway, the days swindle down and you are more and more excited to finally escape, even if for just a little while.
So here you are. Paradise. Paradise you tell yourself... Paradise? Lines are long to the bathrooms at the club, the men are all douche bags and you can't find a spot on the beach that has enough sun without a screaming child scattering sand onto your towel. So maybe those four days on vacation weren't the best, actually, maybe you find yourself excited to get back to a structured routine at home with alarm clocks and deadlines- okay, maybe that part we can all live without. But those weeks prior, how wonderful were they to have something to look forward to. Work didn't seem nearly as bad at the time because you knew your time was limited. You envisioned yourself having the time of your life- even if it wasn't exactly what you expected.
For those who can relate with the words on this page, I ask you to think and be honest with yourself, did you or did you not love that awesome adrenaline every time you thought about that trip? I'm sure you did, and I'm sure that the others around you noticed a nicer, fresher version of you. One that people really enjoyed- not saying that they don't already love the you that you are.
So why not find a reason to have that positive anxiety in you everyday! We can, we all can. We can look forward to cooking something we have never tried before, or enjoy that warm coffee while watching the sun rise in the morning. It's incredible. This whole world is our vice, the one thing that isn't going to judge us, but rather encourage us to love every second of our time here...
This has been one of my primary struggles here in Barcelona. There are so many times that I feel like this trip isn't what I expected it to be, that some of my students aren't the angels I originally pictured, or that sometimes the street reeks of urine. No matter the problem, big or small, I have to remind myself that I need to set the bar lower and enjoy every little thing that comes my way. I need to open my ears to the different languages that pass me on the street because each of those voices have such interesting stories that need to be told. I am grateful that I envisioned such a grander lifestyle out here because I was able to experience a utopia in my mind, while also getting the opportunity to endure the first hand struggles of establishing a new life in a foreign country. It may sound a little negative, but I'm loving it. Every second of it.
I'm learning to appreciate not what will be, but what is. And that my friends is exactly what this journey is all about. Cradle your overcompensating brain and LOVE the outcome whether it's good or bad. I tell you what, you will never find yourself disappointed ever again. I know I won't. I promise.
Now I urge you to look at what ever is to your left, even if it's just a wall. Imagine how it got there, who took the time to install it, where that material was long before it became drywall. Ask these questions and love yourself for loving a wall because that is exactly what will take your hand into the journey of appreciating anything and everything that this world is trying so desperately to show you.
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